Stepping In My Stilettos:
Soooo, who was the LIAR who first coined the phrase:
“Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?”
Yes, I said it! They were lying! I don’t care if it was a mom or dad telling their bullied child those words, they were and are still lies! Words DO, in fact, HURT! Words are powerful and dangerous! That’s why, often times, repetitive speaking or quoting of affirmations are encouraged in order to change one’s perspectives or ideas. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” Proverbs 18:21 KJV I find it interesting that “death” is mentioned first, serves as a cautionary reminder of its adverse effects. It is not easy to just ignore words. It is not easy to ignore when people are attacking you with their words. You may know the words aren’t true, you may have a positive self-image, you may understand that the sources of the attacks are simply mindless and ignorant, yet, it does not mean that those word attacks will not hurt. They do hurt. Bullying hurts. Harassment hurts. These things cut like blades in a sense that you may not feel the initial cut. You may be able to ignore the attacks… but later, when you aren’t even thinking about it, it stings. Words resound like church bells through small town streets. Once the sound is released, it cannot be re-captured. Makes me angry sometimes when I least expect it. Then I’m reminded that its okay to be angry. However, while I’m angry, I have to be careful of the way I respond to things. Sigh But I’m tired of the stupid harassment, the stress, and the rumors. Why is it that I’m always the one who is expected to be the “bigger person?” I don’t like being stepped on. I am more than capable of defending myself in word and deed. I feel like if I just stand up for myself and prove I’m a force to be reckoned with just once, people will re-think their decisions. I’m human too! How long am I expected to sit back and say nothing? It’s not okay to lie and spread rumors on someone just because you know they won’t retaliate! Forget this! I’m tired of being quiet!
Earlier, I listened to my friend read me a scripture during a discussion. She read: 1 Peter 5:6-10 KVJ 6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:9 Whom resist steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.
Funny, because I was tested on this, just moments after hearing this scripture. In my sincere opinion, I believe I FAILED that test, royally! So I’m sure I’ll be tested on it again. Here’s what happened: I was doing some studying when I started to get prank calls. (I’ve been getting a lot of them lately.) At the time, I didn’t know who was calling, so what did I do? I decided to blast them publicly! I took a screenshot and posted the photo on my social media platforms with a caption that read:
“Can’t fall asleep tonight? Are you in the mood to be petty? This is for all my #petty friends out there (no shade.) Feel free to play on this number tonight ‘insert number’ … Idk who’s number it is , but they keep playing on my phone, and I’m trying to study…so have fun! (I’m serious, this is Not a joke—see photo for number) … feel free to keep them entertained this evening…I don’t have time for this foolishness”
Interestingly enough, before hitting the submit button, I felt the Holy Spirit tugging on me, convicting me, and nudging me not to do it. I was being prompted to rise above it. But sometimes, in my frustration, I am stubborn. My mind was set on “handling it my way.” I figured if I expose them, not only would that occupy them and keep them from calling me, but they would feel shame and stop playing on my phone. I posted it. But I couldn’t ignore the conviction. I deleted it and continued to study. Then, God started to work on me. I fell to my knees. I could hear Him say “I am not the author of confusion! If someone is keeping up confusion, why would you be so eager to jump in and join that mess? Give Me your cares and let Me handle it, This situation is My doing, this is My fight!” I begin to realize that the “confusion” only serves as a distraction to what God is really doing. Isn’t that just like satan?… he wants to create whirlwinds of confusion to distract you and throw you off focus! After I posted a semi-retraction, I began to pour my heart out to God; I began to ask for His forgiveness, giving Him my cares and stress. My reaction to someone else’s inappropriate behavior could not be “justified.” I called it “petty” but God’s Word calls it disobedience, because I knew the Holy Spirit was telling me not to do it. I called it “putting an end to the foolishness,” but really, I was showing that I wasn’t truly giving my cares to God and trusting Him. Its so easy to lash out or try to defend yourself when you feel attacked, harassed, and or agitated. But sometimes, tough situations are sent from God, to test our faith, our strength, our endurance, or even to expose weakness and/ or truths that we have been ignoring. Trials are designed to make you stronger. Although different people respond to different things differently, (some may attack, agitate, spread rumors, isolate, or seek to hurt you) you are responsible for your response! You are responsible for acting in love, compassion, and forgiveness. Ha! “Forgiveness.” That’s another topic for another day (I’ll be posting an interesting piece on forgiveness soon.) I digress, remember to fight your petty and rebellious thoughts with your sword (the Word)! Galatians 5:10 NIV I am confident in the Lord that your will take no other view. The one who is throwing your into confusion, whoever that may be, will have to pay the penalty.
Instead of “getting even” recite Romans 12: 18-19 NIV If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
Romans 12: 17-19 KJV17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
Instead of listing to nay-sayers, haters, or just plain evil people, tune them out; turn on your praise & worship music, a sermon, or let your Bible app read to you! Turn your focus and fix your eyes on Christ alone. Lastly, remember to cast your cares, your worries, your stress, and your anxieties onto God! Tell God your problems, your struggles and your worries, then whenever the devil tries to bring up that worry, quote that word! He cares for you, and He is so faithful.
In the meantime… Father, please continue to help me to be Spirit led and not situation led. -Lana